I've decided to take a rest from illustrating my wretched life for a while and concentrate on the philosophical quandaries that plague a not-quite-a-pirate-not-quite-a-mercenary-certainly-not-a-carebear-definately-an-IEEE-Investigator like me.
This is not because life is dull, but the way I figure it, the ghosts and lurkers who may actually read what I write aren't particularly interested in the minutae of countless stealth-bomber runs on Joe's poorly-tanked Drake while he cries for help from CVA because he can't fight worth a crap himself and no one in his so-called corporation wants to come and help him do whatever he thinks he is doing in Providence. And don't get me started on why is all-powerful Allice hasn't formed up yet to sweep the skies clear of every last glowy red IEEE agent, deputised or official.
No, dearhearts, this is more about WTF.
As in WTF is going on? What is going on in EvE? Who lives here? Why do they do the things they do? Is this blog going to be amusing? Thoughtful? Anger-inducing? I doubt it. But lets see where this takes us.
Lets start at the beginning. What's in a name?
Eve/EvE/EVE/The Atrocity Simulator, whatever you prefer to call it, its still a better and more fitting name than WoW, which is poor (in that it doesn't feature a whole "World", there isn't actually any "War" and the "craft" is basically no more than mining/fishing/sewing/putting the kettle on for when the boys come home from the dungeon. I guess the "of" is apt. If its short for "offal"). I have thought hard about why my current game of choice is called EvE and for me it boils down to it being E vs E
.
In a PvP game, Players fight other Players. In a PvE game, the players fight the computer, the Environment. Therefore in EvE games, the Environment fights itself. Now, besides what some popularist-gaming-filth (PGF, more on these later) may claim, there is NO PvE in EvE. Ratting does not count as "game" anymore than cutting the grass for Rupees in Zelda counts as "game". Ratting/Missioning is the only "quest" type (urg I feel unclean) in EvE, and as it is easier than BREATHING does not count as GAME. Therefore, there is nothing but hot player-on-player action. Furthermore, the players make stuff, do things, create, rant, rp etc etc etc all of this creates the rich environment of New Eden. The players are the Environment,.as there is virtually nothing else out there, so therefore it is truely and E v E game. So expect to get messed with. If you don't want interaction with human beings of dubious intent (ie all of them), go back to your console, you PGF.
Life: None
Actually there are a great many people who seem to live only within the walls of the EvE servers. Some of us (such as myself) are characters from other game-worlds who have become trapped in the new digital age. Some are the alter-egos of the Users, some are nothing but soulless programs designed to perform monotonous tasks, and some are just bots. Im not sure which of these Joe Phoenix fits into , but generally most of the folk I regularly encounter fall into either being literary memes or soulless robots.
Popularist Gaming Filth general gravitate into two camps, either the Carebear or the Failed Pirate (these are not mutally exclusive). Popularist Gaming Filth love Call of Duty: Modern Warfare. They love any so-called "game" which basically allows you to "win" by leading you around by the nose telling you to do stuff and offering no threat above having to repeat the same sequence over again, only now you know what to do. Ever played Soldier of Fortune? No? Well its a good example of what I mean. Player walks into room, allows himself to be shot by the enemies so he can see where they are and then kills each one in turn with a a single shot each. Repeat ad nauseum.
I was like this when I played CJ's Elephant Antics on the Commodore 64 when I was 12, but thankfully both games and my ability to enjoy them evolved. PGF are not like this. They like their games like they like their music; bland and chosen for them by Simon Cowell. I like my games like I like my coffee; in a cup and far to hot to drink without training Thermodynamics V first.
PGF become failed pirates when the rage-o-meter hits over 9000 after their fourth ganked retriever sinks beneath the waves of the methane sea, and they discover that CONCORD is a harsher mistress than fate. Thankfully, this can often lead them to the way of the True Pirate, a noble profession to be sure, or even more noble, the Registered Mercenary. Some even decided to sell their XboX 360s and PS3's, but sadly too few. I'd just rather they went back to watch football with the rest of the herd and left me alone to enjoy my video games in peace. Or rather war-crime filled carnage. Whatever floats your boat.
Okay Im bored now. And I have to go back to work.
Part Two maybe later. If I'm bored again.
TTFN
How to GM, according to me. (Part I)
5 years ago


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